Scary Jerry



Clan: Nosferatu
Sire: Giggles
Age: Neonate (< 50 yrs)
Covenant: Ordo Dracul
Title: Hound
City Status: 2

Scary Jerry is the most unpleasant Kindred to look upon in the city, and it’s not a close competition. His bald head is swollen erratically like a massive tumor and is covered in pestilent growths. His eyes are too far apart and unevenly displaced. His nose is not even remotely centered. His teeth are far too big for his mouth, such that he hisses and spittles when he speaks, in his raspy voice that sounds like a basement nerd crossed with a lizard person.

He’s ugly and he knows it. Most of all, he revels in it. Jerry is not shy to tell people that he makes his haven in the sewers underneath the city (not that he’d have to tell anyone, judging by the smell). He seems to take a perverse delight in the revulsion of others—and perverse is the word, because he has a seemingly irresistible urge to talk about sex in even the most inappropriate context.


It really should come as no surprise that Scary Jerry was picked to serve the city as its Hound. Really, he’s the perfect candidate. He’s sneaky. He’s huge and unpleasant to look at and to talk to. More than that, though, Jerry was a network administrator in life—he’s since honed his computer skills to a fine edge. These skills help him track down his prey, which is a task at which he is astonishingly competent.

He doesn’t just use his computer skills to do his job, unfortunately. Jerry also excels at digging dirt. The worst part about this isn’t his skill at it, which is considerable, but rather his reasons. If Jerry only dug up dirt on those he already found suspicious, the Kindred population would largely be at ease. But Jerry is the sort of Kindred who digs up dirt just because.

Somehow, he’s worked his way into the Harpy crowd. Probably it’s because he spends so much time in Elysium—being a walking Masquerade breach, he can’t get social interaction anywhere else—and because he was already grating on everyone’s nerves as it was. The other Harpies neither like him nor trust him, but they do respect him, in their own way.

The Harpies Whisper…

“Not Scary Jerry. Big Scary Jerry. ‘Cause I’m Jerry. And I’m Scary.” He points down to his crotch. “And I’m big.” – Scary Jerry

“We are all a little obsessed by what we cannot have. But someone ought to inform Mister Scary that, feeding aside, most Kindred do not bother with the messy, undignified rutting of the kine.” – Devon Rothchild

“A Nosferatu Harpy? Ha. Ha ha. Ha.” – Dominique Carrol

“All right, who let this one in? Come clean and I promise you won’t be in trouble.” – Bastian Thoreaux

“I heard he fucked a Daeva once. From him. Because he won’t shut up about it.” – Elizabeth Tibideaux

Scary Jerry

Walpurgis zuark